Tattoo Advice From Someone with No Tattoos

I just read in a coffee shop newsletter that 24% of Americans have a tattoo.  After checking with a far more credible source (Wikipedia) it seems the overall numbers aren't that high (only in the mid teens, but over 30% for some age groups.)

Anyway, I thought this was as good a time as any to share my ideas about them.  I know, you've heard the advice, like the only names you should get on you are your own and your mother's.  Anyone can tell you that, here are some rules you may not have heard.

1. If you're going to get a tattoo, get a tattoo.  This isn't as much of a problem now that they're getting more socially accepted, but in my day there was a rash of people getting tiny little tattoos in easily concealed areas.  Ooh, I'm a bad boy/girl, I have a tattoo - here, try this magnifying glass.


2. Spend some time with it.
A lot of people get a sketch of the design they want and think on it for a few days before going through with the procedure.  That's a nice start, but there's another step I recommend: find a friend with Photoshop or other graphic editing software, scan in the design, then blur it a little, and take out some of the colour.  That's what your tattoo is going to look like for most of its existence, so judge it on that.

3. Think about design.
It seems many people just get a picture of something they like and put it on their body.  In other words, they treat their tattoo like their Facebook Cover photo.  Except many people seem to put more thought into Facebook.  Remember that it's not just a picture you like, it's a picture that looks good on your body.  Sure you like your iPhone, but that doesn't mean you want a picture of it on your arm.  To put it in artistic terms, less Mondrian, more Van Gogh.


4. Be careful with sleeves.
Getting "sleeved" means getting an arm completely covered in tattoos.  See, that's the sort of commitment I can respect.  But if you're going to make that kind of commitment, you want credit for it.  The problem is, you can get fake sleeves - that is, actual sleeves with tattoo-like designs on them.  So make sure your arm tattoos come to an uneven edge on your wrist so everyone knows they're real.