Entire Facade

Definition: Pornonym

This is something you want to search for on the Internet, but you're afraid to Google it, because it will get a large number of unintended hits. For instance, I wanted to know who does the song used as the theme on Samantha Bee's new show, Full Frontal. But of course, if I Google "Full Frontal," I'll get something completely different.

Definition: Cryptosurf

So I have to go on some roundabout way of approaching it. I look up Samantha Bee at Wikipedia, link to the show's entry, and read about it's theme song there (Peaches - "Boys Wanna Be Her")

Definition: Surfeilaphobia

In addition, there's the phenomena where you're not afraid of the results of the search, but you're afraid of the consequences if anyone is spying on you. Say, you see a news report on ISIS, and are interested in learning more by searching online. But you know that may get you put on a no-fly list.

Definition: Pornimbular Letdown

The next level is to fear the consequences of strange sounding files in your computer. You might write a largely-innocent article for your blog and save it to the cloud in a file called "full frontal." That will pique the interest of some hacker, before dealing great disappointment at its content. Then next thing you know, someone has put me on a no-fly list.

Bladraw

Bladraw, Definition:
The stalemate that occurs between a couple of men at closely spaced urinals, when neither can urinate because of the presence of the other.

Ambivimatch

Definition:
in sports, a game between two competitors that are both widely hated, such that the neutral observer doesn't want to cheer for either side.  eg. Lakers vs. Celtics, Manchester United vs. Real Madrid

Digital Utilization

Definition: the portion of your technology's usefulness that you actually use. 

I've just used this MacBook Pro for playing Bejewelled, so my digital utilization must be pretty embarrassing.

Logonym

Definition: A word whose structure symbolises its own meaning:

Examples:

• "committee" has unnecessary letters everywhere tacked on wherever they'll go
• "awkward" has that weird-looking "wkw" in the middle
• "bookkeeper" - all the letters are organised into groups
• "embarrassed" has extra letters sticking out

Optweetmum

Definition:A person on Twitter with just the right amount of twitter activity.  Some people have twitter accounts they rarely use (what, why are you looking at me?) so it's hardly worth following them.  On the other hand, people who are too involved in Twitter are hard to follow for a couple of reasons: they tweet everything they do and clog your twitter feed, or they spend most of their time communicating with other twitterers, and their tweets are unintelligible sequences of twitter handles, hash tags, initials, and fragments of conversations you're not involved in.  But a person who is Optweetmum posts regularly, but still types in complete sentences, and understands that e-mail may not be cool, but it's still better for private conversations.

Invernym

Definition: when a person on the Internet types "you're" when they mean "your" rather than the other way around.  Rarely used.

Mistactilation

Definition: during a slow load of a web page or app on a touch-screen device, this is the act of touching the screen to prevent the device from turning off, only to have the desired page/app show up at that instant.  The touch will of course be on a button that causes something else, even slower, to load.

Capp Gap

Capp Gap -  the time it takes the artist of a comic strip to draw a strip, send it to the syndicate, who then distributes it to newspapers.  Thus, this is the amount of time by which even the most up-to-date comic strips tend to trail the latest pop-cultural developments.  This seems to be about a month.

This weekend the Mother Goose and Grimm comic makes a reference to the Justice League of America.  That's right, the weekend that The Avengers opens.  I hate to pick on Mother Goo - screw it - MGAG, since it is one of the funnier long-term strips, but it's hard to imagine a better illustration of the comics page's chronic unhipness than doing a joke about a superhero collective and somehow picking the wrong one.

Limboot

Limboot - the seemingly infinite amount of time it takes your computer to reboot after crashing or freezing in a completely unprecedented manor.