Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Snowbirds and Penguins And Gnomes, Oh My!

That's it, I can't take it any more! I know winter is nearly half over, but it's driving me crazy; it's just so much more intense than it has been in years. Oh, I'm not talking about the weather. I mean the travel commercials.

With Canada finally going through an old-time Canadian winter, all the businesses that profit on travel are smelling blood in the water and working themselves into an ad frenzy, promising you beaches, and sand, and not freezing.

It wouldn't be so bad if they weren't so obnoxious. I blame the Travelocity Roaming Gnome. I complained about him earlier, and I have to apologize for saying he ripped off Amelie - turns out the idea of travelling garden gnomes goes back farther. But it seems every travel agent dot com wannabe is intent on starting their own running joke. Special contempt goes to Booking.com for trying to make "booking" a profanity. All I can say it, go book yourself.

Strangely, none of the ads really make their getaways seem fun or exciting.  They're so focused on the mundane annoyances of travel.  Bad hotels, extra fees, arbitrary restrictions.  And when did "Travel Rewards Card" become a thing?  And they always try to appeal to a bourgeois need to appear better than the Joneses.  Don't use our credit card so you can fly to Florida, get it so your neighbours will wonder how you earn points so quickly.  The impression one gets is that air travel is expensive and inconvenient, and hotels are unpredictable and full of Canada's most superficial consumers.  Suddenly the wind-chill doesn't seem so bad.

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