Photo The Money

I occasionally check a blog called "Rich Kids of Instagram," which, as the name implies, is a compendium of photos posted by rich teens and twentysomethings. Specifically, it's photos showing off their wealth. Well, I've noticed a few things about it:

• Expensive Stuff is Often Surprisingly Ugly

  You'd think that a rich person would be able to surround themselves with great beauty, since they can afford the best and latest designs. But more often, the expensive items in their surroundings work so hard to look expensive that they don't actually look good. Gold trimmed stuff looks nice when it's used with restraint, but when it's on everything it's just overpowering.
  
  If I was super-rich, I'd commission Frank Gehry to design my house, and the interior would look like it burst from an M.C. Escher drawing. But these houses are just marble-column overload. You're reminded that it's expensive, but it doesn't really look exceptional. It's only the quality of the marble, and the lack of price tags on everything, that tell you you're in a house and not a shopping mall.

• They Don't Look Like They're Having Much Fun

  Some of that is of course because whoever chooses the photos for the blog is picking the ones that emphasize their richness rather than fun. So a photo of teens awkwardly posing with a magnum of champaign wins out over kids genuinely enjoying playing with their gold-plated X-Box One. But still, you'd think that they'd occasionally be having fun doing something that shows off their wealth. I'm still waiting for a photo to come with the hashtag #CaviarFight.
  
  What it actually looks like is that these kids are having about as much fun as other teens. That is, they're going through the motions of what their peers have told them is fun, without actually having fun.

• They Don't Mind Looking Rich

  Again, this is a product of the blog selecting the most stereotypical photos. But still, I would have expected that rich kids would have tried hard to look like they aren't rich. You know, kids are so often driven to be something they aren't on the principle that the grass is always greener. Or at least, the need for independence would drive them to show that they aren't typical rich kids. But no, apparently there are lots of kids who don't mind looking like they just stepped out of a Ralph Lauren commercial.
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  They Can Do Much Better With Their Cars

  This is an area where I have some interest and knowledge, and it's a little disappointing. Certainly, I'd like to have their collection of cars. But, well, first of all, they don't seem to be enjoying them so much as showing them off. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad they aren't taking selfies while driving their Lamborghinis at the limit, but I can't help feel like it's a waste for these cars to sit on a driveway looking impressive.
  
  And it would be nice if they had a little more intriguing selection. For one thing, there's a lot of cars that are big on showing off wealth without showing technical ability, like Rolls Royces and Bentleys. And even the sexier cars are just the same few over and over. You'd think some rich kid who reads Car and Driver for the articles would spend his allowance on a classic car that he can lord over his friends. Or just go for an unusual modern car: why get yet another Bugatti when you can be the only one on your block with a Koenigsegg or a Spyker?