Lyrics Belong Only On Cassette Liner-Notes

The music industry is moving to shut down lyric web sites. If you've ever wondered at the lyrics of a song, and thought to Google "<name of song> lyrics", you know that there are a number of sites that are storehouses of song lyrics submitted by other users. Being non-professional, they aren't necessarily correct, but it's easier, faster and less embarrassing than just asking your friends.  But the top fifty such sites have been served with cease & desist orders.

Unlike most techies, I'm actually okay with people protecting intellectual property. I was still in university when music piracy was starting to become big, and I was one of the few people trying to explain to everyone that file sharing was illegal, and frankly immoral. One of the big songs at the time was Elton John's rerecording of "Candle in the Wind," which was sold for charity, so I tried using it to demonstrate the problem with not paying for music. And as a long time fan of independent music, my mental picture of a musician is more needy that most, so I understand their need to get whatever money is due the them.

Yet, this lyrics crackdown is an example of what I hate about copyright. The argument is that these lyric sites - which make money off advertising - are making money off of other people's creations. That's true, but the fact is that no one else is making money off them. Absolutely no one is going to not buy music because they can read the lyrics on line. And the musicians/record companies are not providing the lyrics themselves. So no one is being prevented from making money by the lyric sites. I could understand their concern if artists or labels were publishing lyrics to make money off advertising themselves. It would be a good idea if they did have official lyric sites.  I'd gladly use them, as they'd be more reliable. I might finally learn the opening words to "Sing Me Spanish Techno."

What do you hear?  Lyrics sites are divided between "go to now" and "don't you know."   But it still sounds like "go to hell" to me.  Oh, and remember, you have to buy the album now that you've watched the video.

But no one is making money legally off the lyrics; the lyrics sites are providing a service that the record labels are not willing to, so the record labels and artists are not hurt by them, and they will not gain anything from their disappearance. In other words, I'm okay with protecting the money you make off your own creations, but that doesn't mean you have to prevent anyone else from making money off of them.

From China Without Love

Today was Singles Day in China.  It's an unofficial holiday in which young people celebrate being single.  It's become so popular that it is now biggest online shopping day in the world, putting The West's Valentine's Day to shame. I feel a great satisfaction to see my single brethren win the game of global capitalism.

Most news stories about this are just seeing it as yet another piece of evidence that China is taking over the world. But you could also see it as evidence of China's demographic problems. Their One-Child policy is well known, and combined with male-preferring cultural traditions, it's led to selective abortions and far more sinister ways of ensuring that one child is male. Thus, China has a generation in which men greatly outnumber women, and a lot of single men.

Those are some disturbing overtones to this story, so I'm trying to look at the positive: the Chinese started a rather melancholy holiday as a joke, and they ran with it. I'd love to see more of this from China. During their ascent, they've been portrayed as either an unemotional machine, or as a cryptic, alien culture. But this makes them seem human, and likable.

It's a lot like Japan in the eighties. I grew up during their economic rise, and they were portrayed the same way in media. Today they don't seem scary at all. Their economic stagnation had certainly played a part in that, but the culture they expected had a lot to do with that too, from video games to anime to sushi. It's hard to fear people once you know that they created Hello Kitty.

I'm a Uniter, Not a Divider

Yesterday I implied that hockey and curling represent different ends of the Canadian cultural spectrum. So what can bring this country together? NHL endorsed curling brooms!

Does That Make Four Solitudes?

When people talk about the Summit Series, they often talk about the national soul-searching that came with realizing we might not be the best in the world at Hockey, which seemed to be the only way we defined ourselves. But we won the series, so we managed to avoid all that.

And during the Rob Ford Crack Crisis, I now think I know what it would have been like if we had lost, and actually had to redefine ourselves.  A lot of people are noting that the dichotomy of Ford vs. Canadian stereotypes is evidence of Canada's two emerging personalities.  I'd have to agree.  And by coincidence, I came across this chart which I made months ago but never got around to posting:

Sport	Hockey	Curling
Liberal Prime Minister	Jean Chretien	Pierre Trudeau
Mulroney Cabinet Member	John Crosbie	Joe Clark
80' Rock Group	April Wine	Rush
Current Rock Group	Nickleback	Arcade Fire
TV Network	CTV	CBC
Adult-Contemporary Singer	Shania	Feist
TV Comic	Rick Mercer	Ron James
Hockey Analyst	Don Cherry	Dave Hodge
Nation-Defining Celebration	Vancouver 2010	Expo 67
Newfoundland Premier	Danny Williams	Clyde Wells
Hip-Hop Star	Drake	K'Naan
Definitive Degrassi Series	Degrassi TNG	Degrassi Junior High
Toronto Newspaper	Toronto Sun	Toronto Star
Supposedly National Toronto Newspaper	National Post	Globe and Mail
Music Awards	Junos	Polaris
Toronto's Football Team	Bills	Argos
Toronto Mayor	Rob Ford	David Miller

What's weird is that even as we change our national personality, we still seem to hold on to pride in our stereotypical character. 

This Could Be Anywhere In The World

The German word schadenfreude means taking joy in another's misfortune. Usually when anyone mentions it, they have to make a joke about how only the Germans would need such a word. I like to point out that the English language apparently needs such a word too, which is apparent since we adopted the German word.  And at least the Germans didn't try to avoid responsibility by co-opting someone else's word.

Anyway, there's now a word defined in Urban Dictionary, schadenforde. It's deriving pleasure from the misfortune of Toronto mayor Rob Ford. Of course, there's been plenty of opportunity to do exactly that in recent months.
 
But I find myself having a sort of second-order schadenforde, in which I take pleasure in watching others experience misfortune as they realize they have a racist, lying, multi-addicted, irresponsible bully as mayor, and a lot of the city wants it that way. No, this isn't an I-hate-Toronto situation: as I said a few months back, I've made some amount of peace with the city. Besides, part of my guilty pleasure comes from the fact that really, Rob Ford could have happened anywhere.

All it takes is a large number of people who don't normally follow politics and have an unfocused anger. That describes a lot of cities.  We've known for a while that there are a lot of voters who don't really follow the news, feel highly persecuted in spite of living a comfortable life, and feel very little connection with other people in their community.  It's a big problem, but we've always looked the other way.  Finally we have a more accurate picture of our society and the people in it.

Gag Me With A Greasy Spoon

This weekend I went to Wimpy's diner. Like many modern diners, it goes for a fifties aesthetic. And, like many modern diners, it isn't always accurate in its depiction. I don't mind if the food is not necessarily straight from the decade (I ordered a wrap) but the decor could be better. For instance, there are a bunch of records tacked to the wall. I tried to check what the records were, but the only label I could read while seated turned out to be Howard Jones. I could have given them a pass on a fifties-flavoured eighties artist like Huey Lewis, but not a only-in-the-eighties synth-abuser. It didn't help that the muzak played the Pet Shop Boys shortly after.

That brings up something I'd like to see: an eighties-oriented eatery. But an eighties diner wouldn't make much sense: diners use fifties style because they're a part of that decade's culture. So what form would an eighties eatery take? I'm envisioning a fast food place. Yes, I know, fast food is older that that, but it seemed to come of age in the eighties. We had "where's the beef?", non-ironic use of The Burger King, and the more-than-occasional Grimace sighting.

I see a fast food place that is unapologetic - no modernist architecture and urban-cafe interior styling - I want all rounded-plastic furniture. All the food comes in Styrofoam containers.  You can't order drinks: you take the Pepsi Challenge and you're stuck with whatever wins.  Fifties-style diners usually have the "mens" and "womens" on the washroom doors signified by pictures of Elvis and Marilyn Monroe.  Instead, we'll have Michael Jackson and Madonna.

I'm hoping some of this will actually happen. As we approach 2015, the year they went to in Back To The Future II, someone will make a real Café 80's.

Rear-Window Confessional

I know I've already complained about the stick figure families on the back of SUV's and minivans. It's a trend that doesn't look like it's going away. On the contrary, there are now lots of variations: aside from showing the family doing their favourite activities, you can also have them wearing the uniform of their favourite sports team. Or you can show your family as zombies. Or Star Wars characters. Speaking of which: if you're depicting R2-D2 as part of your family, doors that represent your pet or your child? Or your Roomba?

What's interesting is how they tell stories about a family. Not so much if you have a stereotypical family with a stick-father, stick-mother, and 2.2 stick-kids. But if I see just one parent and kids, I feel sympathy for what they've been through. I suppose you'd only put your kids on if you have exclusive custody: otherwise you'd want to just have a dotted outline of your kids.

On the other hand, if it's two parents and no kids, it feels like they're rubbing it in. They're saying, not only are we unimpeded by children, we're still young and innocent enough to use this meme that was intended for children. On the other hand, it's so sad to see a minivan with two parent stickers but no kids, they've probably been trying for a while.

Sometimes the stickers tell a weird story. Once I saw men playing hockey, two men drinking, a couple of kids, and three dogs. I'd love to know the story behind that.

So rather that be angry about this trend, I've become supportive of it. It's our culture's attempt to tell stories through pictures, the way the Maori use tattoos. Don't stop at displaying your familial arrangements; tell your whole life story in your back window. Maybe I'll have some sympathy for you when you cut me off if I can see your unhappy childhood in the process.